| Chelman |
| Krijg de bloemetjes |
 |
 |
|
 Posted 04-05-2004 22:32 by Chelman |
 |
|
Voor de zombie liefhebbers:
quote:
So, now you are a zombie. A walking cadaver. An undead spawn of Satan. A sickening meatbag. You are slow, rotten and HUNGRY!
HOW TO SURVIVE AGAINST HUMANS
Your biggest disadvantage is certainly your speed. Forget about running. You have to kill those pesky slimebags using surprise and fear. Closets are your best friends (other good places to hide are: back of a car, behind a door and in the shower). Hide and sneak but be sure to roar loudly (I doubt you can do anything else anyway) when a living being sees you.
Once the cattle is frozen in fear, flail your arms rapidly in it's direction. Now this shouldn't be too difficult. Crack open the skull and feast upon it. You may take a spoon if you feel dandy (a la Bad Taste).
Choose your victims carefuly
Go for slim women, children and weak old men. If you see a man wielding a chainsaw, shotgun or weed eater, forget it and run (crawl if your legs ran the other way). Screaming blondes are a meal of choice and don't need a lot of preparation.
If you live outside a city, you will need extra skills to find preys. Hide in rest stops, hitch hike or simply leave for the dense population areas. And don't forget that cows, horses and chickens are not really tasty. You will only get bitter and bitter if you keep eating animals.
In cities it's pretty easy. You will be able to survive for days before the cattle even starts understanding what's going on and thinks about hiding or fleeing in a lone house deep in the woods. Then go for the malls, subways, schools and radio/TV stations (it's inevitable that the food will try to communicate with the outside).
Help! My snack is locked in a house!
At some point, groups of humans will start hiding in houses and block the exits with everything they can find. My suggestion is to wait outside and let your comrades get killed by trying to force the entrances. Try to shut down the electricity by munching through the power lines. You have nothing to fear, you will only feel dizzy for a couple of minutes.
If you are nearby water with body parts. One day or another, the diner will have to go outside for food or gas. Now it's your chance!
Random tips
- Use rocks to break windows. Don't punch through it, your hand may fall.
- Wait a few days before eating your snack, it will taste better.
- Humans having sex are the easiest preys, just join in the fun.
- Hospitals are great but it's entirely self-service.
I hope this file will help you in your new unlife. Send me your personal experiences.
Good luck and don't forget: keep your eyes in their sockets!
KOSOVO JE SRBIJA! SVETA SRPSKA ZEMLJA !
|
Ik heb een hekel aan snelle zombies
ik lag echt in een deuk toen ik voor het eerst mensen daarover zag praten... menen jullie dat nu serieus?)
) hebben zombies alleen een soort instint, wat zegt: levend vlees.
